


If I Scream Will You Save Me?

by Purplesauris



Series: Luttes writing prompts [3]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Amputee!Eren, Detective!Levi, Horror, M/M, Panic Attacks, Week 3
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-18
Updated: 2014-10-18
Packaged: 2018-02-21 15:47:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,371
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2473700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Purplesauris/pseuds/Purplesauris
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eren stays in his little room, with his little bed and little toilet. He has no company other than the whispers through the walls.</p>
            </blockquote>





	If I Scream Will You Save Me?

**Author's Note:**

> Heyo guys! This is Lutte's third week prompt: Horror. As always, like the fic? Hate it? Tell me so at purplesauris.tumblr.com!

Screams, all I hear are screams. The screams echo, and in my disoriented, pain filled mind, the sound is oddly soothing. It shouldn’t be, but it is. That means that someone else is keeping his attention, and I’m safe for now, safe in my own little room with the little bed and little toilet. I sit up as I hear a loud bang, like a gun going off, and dread rushes through me as I hear him coming to my door. Please, I don’t want to see you today, I just want to sleep. Tired. So tired. Please let me sleep. No, please don’t do that. I don’t want to visit that room today. There’s too much white, it’s too bright, it smells too sharp. The table is cold against my back, his face is too close to mine, I can feel a blade slicing into my skin, and pain skitters up my spine. Somewhere I hear screaming, and I think it's me, but I don’t feel my throat aching, so I know it isn't.

The pain is melting into my skin, ripping through me, and I briefly hear a low _snap_ before pain erupts in my right thigh, and my vision goes black. I’m floating in nothing, suspended in air as I hear a wet ripping sound and warm fluid running under my body. I can hear myself whimpering as I come back to my body, and as my eyes flutter open I’m greeted by his face above mine. A sweet smile on his face as he strokes my cheek.

“Such a good boy, Eren. You did so well.” I’m relieved by the saccharine words, that means I’ll get food and that I can sleep without fear of him. I feel gauze being pressed onto my leg and bandages wrapped around to secure them, then I feel him wiping my skin off. He picks me up in his arms, holds me against his chest as he carries me back to my room, and even though I’m angry that he did something to me I submit, I allow him to arrange my limbs on the bed like I’m a doll and do nothing against it. I feel him stroke my hair and murmur more praises before he moves to the door, leaving me alone once more. I lay there in bed, body aching and lids heavy, and I can’t even keep myself awake long enough to eat. I welcome the darkness willingly, let it encompass me in it’s dead embrace as it pulls at my body, fills my head with nothing other than the pain.

I don’t know how long I sleep for, don’t know how long I spend in my Limbo-like dream; all I know is that when I wake up he’s standing above me, eyes wide and knife poised to strike. I stare at him with wide eyes, because he said I was a good boy, he said I did great, so I’m supposed to be left alone. I’m supposed to be left alone, right? RIGHT? If he isn’t going to do as he’s told and leave his good boy alone, then I won’t listen either, and I open my mouth, screaming at the top of my lungs. He hisses in displeasure at my disobedience, but before he can drive the blade into my body like he wants to a loud bang goes off, and I watch in fascination as red blossoms over his shirt. I watch as he drops to the ground and people rush in, shouting and yelling about making sure he won’t hurt anyone else and to see if there are any survivors. I reach out, struggling against my heavy limbs as I try to sit up.

"There's a boy here!" The man that shot him quickly puts his gun away, rushing up and crouching down next to my bed. "Can you hear me? What's your name?"

The man helps me sit up, his grip gentle, as if he fears I'll break. I keep quiet, because he's still in the room, and I don't want to get in trouble. I look at him lying there on the floor over the officers shoulder as he picks me up from my bed and I raise my hand, waving goodbye. The officer is very careful with me, keeping me close and shielding me from the view of other people gathered on the street. My head is swimming; the air smells weird, it's so bright, and I'm cold. I look about in childish wonder; was this what it was like to go outside? I look up at the night sky, looking at all the pretty stars and a moon that shines bright down on me, and I have to raise a hand to block some of the light because my eyes burn. There are lights on all around me, and I’m being placed on a stretcher, a lady looking at me from above as the bed jolts and I’m put in an ambulance.

“Can you hear me sweetheart?” I blink, my eyes wide as I nod. I like how she calls me sweetheart, it reminds me of my mother. 

“You’re pretty.”

The lady laughs, a sweet sound that makes me grin sillily, reaching to touch her hand. “Thank you. Can you tell me your name?”

“Eren.” She smiles at me and grips my hand as a man looks at my leg, pulling back the gauze carefully. 

“Well, Eren, I'm Petra. We’re gonna make sure you’re alright and take you somewhere safe, okay?”

“Okay.” Petra holds my hand as the other man presses fresh gauze to the wounds on my body, stopping the bleeding quickly. I look down at myself for the first time, and my eyes widen in sick fascination. Where’d it go? I wiggle my toes, but as I look down at the stump of my right leg I hear an echo of a low _snap_. “Where’s my leg?”

“Gone, sweetheart.” She squeezes my hand and I smile sleepily, squeezing back.

“Okay. I hope it doesn’t miss me. Can I sleep?”

“Yes, go ahead and sleep.”

“Are you gonna stay?” I hold her hand tightly, gripping her so I don’t float away. A strange numbness is flowing through me, and I find it harder and harder to stay awake. 

“I won’t leave your side.” I sigh in relief and close my eyes, letting myself sleep. For once, I have good dreams, filled with stars and snow and a great big moon. 

______________________________________________________________

I can hear soft voices over a constant beeping sound, and my limbs feel nice and weightless. I feel giddy, happy, and when I shift on the bed my body doesn't hurt for once. The voices stop and a hand touches my shoulder softly, a soothing voice reaching my ears. "Are you awake, sweetheart?"

My eyes flutter open and I squint against the harsh lights, my heart speeding up when I smell the sharp air, but the walls are a warm orange, not white. "You stayed."

"I said I would." She helps guide me into a sitting position and I look down at my stump, lifting it up. 

"I can feel my toes, but they aren't there. D'you think wherever my leg is that my toes are wiggling?" The lady laughs softly and brushes my hair away from my forehead, looking me over. I like her eyes, they're like gold, and her hair is a reddish blonde, kind of like a sandy orange. 

"Like worms when you unbury them." I giggle, and even though my mind is foggy I have enough sense to look around the room. There's a woman with black hair and dark eyes sitting on the couch, a man with blonde hair resting his head on her shoulder while he sleeps.

"How long was I sleeping?"

"We kept you asleep for about two weeks so you could heal. How do you feel?"

"Good! My head hurts a little, but that's all." Petra smiles at me and squeezes my hand. 

"That's great, Eren. You're healing very fast, so you could go home in a couple of days." Petra notices my gaze locked on the two sitting on the couch and she smiles encouragingly. "They've been here everyday since you got here. They love you a lot, sweetheart."

"Can I.." Petra nods and gets up without another word, winking at me as she leaves the room, the door clicking shut behind her. I reach out for Mikasa in the same moment that she hugs me tightly, leaving Armin to look around in confusion before jumping up.

"Eren!" Armin hugs me as well, the two of them crying as I smile until my cheeks hurt, smelling the familiar scent of Mikasa's favorite perfume and the smell of old books that clings to Armin. They're familiar, so familiar that my chest aches and I cry, literal tears of joy as Mikasa takes my hand, the two of them sandwiching me between them on the bed. 

"Mikasa.. Armin.. You two really grew up while I was gone."

"Eren, I'm sorry we couldn't save you sooner."

I shrug and snuggle between them. "You did all you could." They're both tense next to me, and Mikasa looks like she wants to ask, but just then a tall blonde man walks in, holding a clipboard. 

"Alright Eren lets take a look at- oh, hello." I blink a couple of times while Armin and Mikasa duck off the bed, looking ashamed. 

"Hi. We were just going to go."

The man smiles good-naturedly, blue eyes watching us all. "You're more than welcome to come back tomorrow, as long as Eren is okay with it. Why don't you guys go get something to eat and get some sleep?"

"Okay. We'll see you later, right Eren?" I nod, struggling to keep a smile on my face when my leg starts to ache. Mikasa takes Armin's hand as they walk out, and the doctor comes to stand next to my bed. He holds a hand out which I grip tightly and shake once, his hand cool in my clammy one. 

"It must hurt. Do you want more pain medication?" I shake my head because the pain is familiar, it keeps me grounded. "My name is Erwin Smith, I'm your primary doctor while you're here."

"You already know who I am, right?" Erwin nods with a polite smile, scribbling down my vitals. 

"Are you fine with a couple of police officers coming in later? They have a few questions pertaining your situation."

I frown but shrug, wincing when pain trickles through my leg. "I don't care. Better late than never."

"Alright. May I look at your leg, please?" I wave my hand and lean my head back as he unwraps the bandages from around my leg, fingers working gently as he looks at the row of neat stitches, nodding. "Your leg healed very quickly. Barely even a scar. Interesting.”

“So you can take the stitches out?”

“Yes, but we’ll still keep you here a day or two longer to make sure nothing goes wrong. I’ve never seen anyone recover like you have, Eren. You haven’t even had an episode since you were found.”

“An.. Episode?” Erwin looks at me as he sets my leg back on the bed and stands up, gathering the scissors and throwing out the stitches that used to hold my skin together. He takes the needle out of the back of my hand as well, the IV useless now that I’m conscious and able to eat and drink for myself.

“Someone who went through what you did, they don’t just come out of it with no mental scarring. So far, you’ve shown remarkable mental strength."

I look at him uncertainly, keeping myself still. "I'm a good boy.." My voice is only a whisper as I avert my eyes, soft frown on my face. "A good boy doesn't complain."

"Who are you a good boy for?" A new voice speaks up from the doorway and I flinch, looking up briefly with wide eyes. Erwin stands up, clearing his throat and slipping the clipboard into a cubby at the end of my bed. 

"Levi, you couldn't have waited just a few more minutes? You could have-"

"It's fine." My voice is soft but Erwin stops immediately, eyes searching my expression. 

"If you need something, press the call button." I nod, sinking into the pillows with a tired sigh. I hear Erwin leaving quietly and lighter footsteps as the officer drops down into the chair beside the bed. We sit in silence for a few minutes before I turn to look at him, waiting. 

"What's your name?"

The man looks at me with a cool expression, eyes half lidded and eyebrows furrowed. He has pale skin and an undercut, hair parted neatly, his outfit pristine. "Officer Levi Ackerman. Are you ready to answer questions?"

"Ready as I'll ever be." Levi snorts in amusement but doesn't smile, and I find myself distracted by how sharp he looks even when he acts nonchalant.

"Can you describe your kidnapper?"

"He had white hair, like he was older, and he had a beard. He wore glasses, I think. I'm not sure.. He kept my room dark."

Levi nods once. "How long were you there?"

"Uh.. I was taken on my birthday. It's really fuzzy.."

"When's your birthday?"

"March 30th."

"It's April 24th of the next year, Eren." I blink in shock, staring down at my hands.

"I.. I'm 20. I was really there for a year?" Levi stays silent, a notepad in his hand and a pen spinning along his knuckles in his other hand as he waits. 

"Were there others?" I nod and Levi sits up, expression shifting into a more serious one. "How many? Did you see any of them?"

"N-no I.." I shudder and grip the blanket tightly, squeezing my eyes shut. My breath leaves in trembling gasps and I pull my leg up against my chest, trying to make myself smaller. 

"Eren, what's your safeword?"

That derails my train of thought and I look up at him confusedly. "Huh?"

"When I'm asking you questions, if there's something you can't answer, say the safeword."

"Umm.. Night?" 

"Okay, night it is. Are you okay to answer my question, or should we move on?"

"No, I can answer I was just.. Shocked. Yes, there were others. We all took turns serving the food to the ones who couldn't get up."

"Did you have regular meals?" I shake my head, fingers running over the scar on my leg absently. 

"We got food when we were good. I don't know any of their names.. He kept us apart except for feeding time."

"Did you ever get to leave?" I shake my head, looking at him. 

"He said the outside world would make us dirty, make us bad boys and girls."

"He took girls?"

"Just one. He killed her. I heard her screams from his room."

"His room?"

"The room with the table and the tools. Where he did this." I motion to my leg and Levi grimaces as if the thought pains him. 

"Do you know what he did to the others?"

"All kinds of things. Sometimes he'd take their organs out.. Take a limb.. Kill them. He used to tell me how they squirmed sometimes, or he'd describe what it was like to dig around in their insides."

Levi makes a small noise of disgust but looks at me evenly, staying strong while I fight to keep my words steady and my mind clear. My leg hurts so I start rubbing it slowly, trying to alleviate the pain a little without drugs. "I have two more questions I have to ask. How did he treat you?"

I mull over the question, pushing my hair out of my face and pausing while looking at a strand. "He said I was his favorite. I was his good boy. When he was cutting me up or doing something to me he would touch my face or my neck when I was good." I show Levi what I mean before taking a deep breath and continuing. "If I didn't scream I got extra food, and he would let me sleep without doing anything to me. He.. He would tell me how pretty I was, how much he loved me and how good I was to him. He said such sweet words but.. They didn't mean anything."

“Did he-”

“No!” My voice is painfully loud in the room as I stare at Levi in fear. “No he didn’t- I wouldn’t- he-”

“I’m sorry, Eren. I had to ask.” Levi’s voice is soft and he tucks his notepad in his pocket as he stands up. I shudder at the cold breeze coming in through the window, and it takes a moment for me to register the weight around my shoulders. The jacket is warm, immensely so, and it smells like pine and.. tea? Yeah, tea. I pull it tighter around me and push my arms into the sleeves as Levi closes the window before sitting back down in the chair beside my bed. Levi is smaller than me but I still swim in the jacket as I fidget on the bed, wanting to get up but knowing I wouldn’t be able to support myself with just one leg. “Hey Eren, do you want something to eat?”

I nod furiously, my stomach grumbling loudly. “I don’t know if I’m allowed to eat though.” Levi waves his hand and pulls out a cell phone, tapping something for a moment before looking up at me. 

“What do you want on your pizza?” My mouth waters at the mere mention of the cheesy food.

“Just a regular Hawaiian style.” Levi nods and taps away at his phone again, stowing it with a small huff. “Hey Levi?”

“What, kid?”

“Why’re you working my case?” Levi leans the chair back on two legs, feet propped up on the edge of my bed. 

“Because I took it. I’m the officer they give cold cases to.”

“I was a cold case?” I gaze at Levi curiously, scooting over and patting the space next to me because Levi speaks quietly and I can’t hear him very well. Levi gets up without a word, undoing the laces of his shoes and toeing them off before sliding onto the bed next to me, placing my legs in his lap so I can sit facing him. 

“You were. A sudden disappearance with no sightings or evidence to go off of to find you, it was basically hopeless. Armin and Mikasa made it very clear that you weren’t dead to the head of the office, so they brought me in.”

“How did you manage to find me?”

“I went back to the last place you were seen and I waited. The guilty always go back to the scene of the crime. I took the license plate number from his car and checked it against partials we had from other kidnappings of the same circumstance.”

“Wow. You really know what you’re doing!” Levi just shrugs, looking up at the door and clearing his throat.

“Come in.” The door swings open and the scent of pineapples and pizza sauce hits my nose as another police officer walks in, grinning.

“I can never manage to sneak up on you!” The woman sets the pizza and a bag on the little rolly table while smiling cheekily at Levi.

“It’ll be a cold day in hell when you can. How much was it?”

“Don’t you worry your fine booty one bit, I have it covered this time!” Levi mutters bullshit under his breath and I giggle, looking at the person in front of me curiously. The cop catches my eyes and grins widely, practically vaulting over the bed to sit on the other side. “Hey there! The name's Hanji, catching bad guys is my game!” I laugh and shake the hand she holds out to me.

“I’m Eren. Thank you for bringing pizza.”

“Anything for a cutie pie like you! You ever need anything while sitting in this boring room you just call, okay?”

“Oh um, thanks." Hanji grins at me and squeezes my hand before jumping up and rushing in a flurry to the door. 

“I’ll see you at the station Levi! Remember, call me if you need anything, and I do mean anything!” Hanji winks at me before ducking out the door, slamming it behind her. Levi pulls the table closer and reaches into one of the pockets of his jacket, being careful not to move me around too much while rummaging. He pulls out a bottle of hand sanitizer and drops a small amount on to both of our hands, serving me a piece of pizza after. I bite into it hungrily, ignoring how hot it is as I make a noise of appreciation. Levi is watching in amusement as he cuts his slice up into little squares, stabbing them with a fork instead of using his hands. 

“Why’d you want to become a cop?”

“I’m a detective. I did stupid shit when I was younger. Figured being a law bringer would make up for it.” Levi takes a bite and chews before swallowing, sitting back. “What about you? What are you going to do?”

“Well.. I wanted to be a photographer but that idea is sorta shot now.” I lift my leg before going back to eating my pizza.

“Bullshit.” I regard Levi in shock and bewilderment, tilting my head to the side. “Don’t ever give up on a dream just because the odds seem to be against you. Look those who say you can’t in the eye and tell them to go fuck themselves then prove to them that you can do whatever the fuck you want.”

I stare down at my leg, running fingers over the tender skin before my brows furrow in determination. “You’re right.”

“Damn straight I’m right. Now eat before it gets cold.” We lapse back into a comfortable silence, me laughing at Levi while he cuts his pizza up and him flicking pineapple at me in retaliation. I smile and catch the pieces in my mouth, laughing when one hits my cheek with a small splat. I manage to eat two pieces of the pizza, feeling very full but content as Levi throws away our trash and scoots the table away. He makes me sip on water slowly to keep my stomach from forcing everything out of me as he sits back on the bed. He doesn’t seem bothered by my stump in the slightest, untroubled with having my legs on his lap. He traces the scar lightly, being careful not to harm me. “Did it hurt?”

“At first it did. I don’t remember too much, just this odd sound, like a snap, and then pain.” 

"He didn't sedate you, did he?" I shake my head and yawn, the warmth of the jacket and Levi sharing the small hospital bed making me sleepy. Levi opens his mouth and the beginning of my name rests on his lips when a loud beep erupts from Levi's belt, making me yelp in surprise. Levi pats my leg and pulls out his phone, tapping the screen to answer the call, putting in on speaker. "Ackerman."

"C'mon Levi! We have a robbery!" Levi swears and slides out from under me while ending the call, stowing his phone and pulling his shoes back on. I move to take off his jacket but he stops me, taking the badge out of the pocket before moving to the door. 

"I'll see you later kid." Levi mock salutes and ducks out the door, leaving me in confused silence. I yawn loudly, breaking myself out of my shock as I pull the blanket over my lap. A nap won't hurt, will it? 

_I'm awake. Wasn't I just asleep? Hadn't an officer come in a questioned me about him? When I open my eyes and look around im back in my little room, the lights off and my eyes struggling to make out even the shape of the doorway. I throw the blanket off of my legs and get up from the bed, stumbling over and peering out of the little hole on the door. The hallway is lit dimly by lights, and the longer I look the more I think I can see faces in the darkness._

_"Hello? Is anyone out there?"_

_I flinch when something slams into my door, and a face pops up in front of my eyes, a scream ripping from my throat. The face is incomplete, the right side almost completely missing, the eye hanging down and swaying with the movements of the head. Blood sprays when it lunges towards me, slamming into the door as its teeth clack. I scream again and stumble back, pain erupting like an inferno through my right leg. My back slams against the opposite wall as the door rattles. A smooth voice speaks through the door and fear freezes my veins._

_"Eren, come out here. Be a good boy."_

_I whimper but do as the voice says, reaching out for a doorknob that appears on the door. I grab it with my left hand, gripping it firmly even when it turns into a blood soaked hand, yanking me forward and onto a cold metal table. Pain lances up through my leg, ripping through me as I stare in paralyzed fear at him looming over me._

_"You've been a very bad boy, Eren. A very_ very _bad boy."_

_"No! No, I've been good, I promise!" He shakes his head, a sad smile on his face as his hand connects with my face, whipping my head to the side. I gasp at the sting of the hit, a low sob escaping my throat as I flinch away from his touch. He obviously doesn't like that because he grabs my hair, slamming my head back against the table, and I can see stars swimming in front of my eyes. He continues to slam my head back into the table until I hear a faint crack and my eyes roll back in my head. I come to with the worst headache, just in time for him to drive a knife through my stomach, twisting it cruelly as I scream, my mind in pure agony as he yanks the blade down, tearing through my skin. He pulls the blade from my stomach, letting the blood drip onto my face before drawing it back. I see the blade swinging down, and then I see nothing at all._

I jerk awake with a scream that tapers off to a sob, my head threatening to split apart. I feel the back of my head gingerly, sighing when I don't find anything. I try to choke back sobs, covering my mouth with my hand as I try to stifle my tears. The room is dark and the walls are closing in on me, trapping me so that _he_ can come and get me. I can hear my heartbeat thundering in my ears, drowning out the sound of my panting breaths as I pull at my hair. The shadows that linger in the corners are creeping up to me, running their gross fingers all over me and yanking at the jacket wrapped around my shoulders. I grip it tight with shaking hands, keeping it wrapped around me, inhaling the scent of pine and tea, and for a moment the darkness recedes. 

I scream and jump back when the door slams open, bile rising in my throat as I gasp for air, squeezing my eyes shut, heart racing and blood pounding through my veins. I hear a click and footsteps all around me, coming closer and closer, coming to get me to take me away and I can't breathe, when did it get so hard to breathe? Where is everyone, why aren't they saving me? I open my eyes, a scream ripping from my throat when a hand touches my shoulder, and my vision is flooded with light, chasing the darkness away as arms wrap around me, rocking me slowly as a soft voice murmurs in my ear. It's so hard to hear over the pounding of my heart, hard to decipher the words, but the arms around me are warm and a hand is smoothing over my back slowly as I'm rocked. Beat by beat my heart slows back down, allowing me to hear what's being said to me, and I recognize the voice, but they aren't speaking.

Levi is singing, murmuring lyrics to me soothingly as he rocks us side to side, rubbing my back as I grab onto his shirt, hot tears running down my cheeks. My breathing is still erratic, and I can't breathe through my stuffy nose, but Levi doesn't seem to mind. I don't know how long Levi sings to me while I battle away the darkness of my dream, but he stays the whole time, even when I jump and knock my head into his jaw when I hear a loud beep. Levi ignores the noise, reaching over to turn on the small bedside lamp, illuminating the room further. The light is comforting, and eventually I stop shaking, my breathing returning to normal and all the tension that has my stomach twisted in knots eases away, leaving me weak and drained. 

I pull in a shaky breath, taking the tissue that Levi offers me to dry my eyes and blow my nose. "Better?" I give a mute nod, eyes trained on the window where night has fallen, the moon shining bright still. I shudder and tear my gaze away from the window, looking at Levi's hand instead as he taps away at his phone. "What's your address?" I frown and reach for the phone, tapping in the address because my throat is still tight in fear. "Hanji will bring you some regular clothes, okay?"

"Why? They said they were keeping me a few more days." I manage to croak out, coughing afterward. 

"Guess they changed their minds. Mikasa said you can live with her until you're fully recovered."

"How do you know Mikasa?" Levi shrugs, looking at his phone as it beeps. 

"We're cousins. Hanji's on her way." I lean my head against Levi's shoulder, tired but not willing to go back there. I don't want to go to Mikasa's, I want to go home. An odd thought strikes me and I frown, clearing my throat.

"If I was gone for a year, how was I not evicted?" Levi snorts and rests his chin atop my head. 

"I think your parents paid for the months you were gone." Levi is skillfully avoiding the subject of my freak out, and part of me is grateful that he isn't pressing for information. Part of me wants to spill everything, to ask him, beg him to stay with me because he's the only one who doesn't look at me with pity. 

"Levi, you'll visit, won't you?"

"Do you want me to visit you?" I hesitate then nod, pulling the jacket around me tighter. Levi wraps his arms around me and hugs me, whispering. "Then you can't get rid of me." 

"Thank you." Levi hugs me tighter before loosening his hold, head moving towards the door.

"Quit loitering outside Hanji." The door opens and Hanji steps in, a bag in hand. 

"Hey sweetie, you excited?" Hanji sets the bag on the bed and wraps her arms around the two of us, smiling softly. 

"I'm kinda nauseous." Hanji snickers and places a wet kiss on my cheek, placing one on Levi’s cheek too despite his protests. I reach for the bag, pulling it over and pawing through its contents, finding a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt along with some of my underwear. It’s odd to be holding clothes that are mine, or to wear clothes in general because he never let me wear clothes. “Hey uh.. Levi?”

“Need some help?” I nod, cheeks warm with a blush because Levi isn’t him, Levi is someone kind to me. It’s different with him seeing me naked, seeing how my ribs protrude and the ugly scar on my stump of a leg. Levi doesn’t seem phased by it though, he just picks me up carefully and carries me towards the bathroom, turning on the light before bringing me in. “Do you think you can stand and take a shower?”

“I can try to.” Levi ruffles my hair and sets me down in the small area designated for the shower, letting me grab onto the bar to steady myself as I put weight on my leg for the first time in weeks. Levi hovers nervously beside me until he knows I can stand on my own, then he pokes his head out to speak to Hanji for a moment. I grip the rail tightly, my leg shaking from the effort of holding me up, even with as light as I must be right now. Levi helps me out of my hospital gown then turns the water on, letting me stand under the spray and enjoy the warmth for a little while. I’m aware of Levi standing behind me, and I try not to jump when he holds me steady, hands on my sides as I scrub at my skin, washing once, twice, thrice, until I feel clean. 

By now my left leg aches and my hips are protesting so Levi guides me to sit down on a plastic stool under the water. “May I wash your hair?” I nod quickly, closing my eyes as Levi rubs soap into my hair, nails scratching lightly over my scalp as he works the soap through. I relax on the stool as Levi soaps through my hair twice, working the knots out slowly before working conditioner in, running his fingers through the strands. Levi whistles while he rinses my hair, tipping my head back into the spray, standing over me. I blink open my eyes when the water shuts off to see Levi standing there in wet scrubs, hair dripping wet as he hands me a towel. 

“Levi, can I ask you something?”

“Hmm?” Levi pulls his shirt over his head before handing me my underwear, eyes trained on the ceiling as I pull them on. Levi crouches in front of me, helping me pull my sweatpants on before he ties the leg closed, hand lingering on my stump before he hands me my shirt and strips the scrubs off. I try to keep my eyes off of him, but his skin is so pretty, and he has some insane muscles, even for a cop. I stare down at my hands instead, scolding myself for looking. Shouldn't I be worried about how I'm going to live on my own? "How come you came back?"

Levi looks up from his shirt, tucking the edges in before buttoning his pants. "I didn't want to leave you by yourself."

"I have Mikasa and Armin."

"Can you talk to them about what happened?" I pause as Levi picks me up again, carrying me back to my bed.

"Not really. I don't even know if I can talk to you."

"You don't have to, but if so, I'll be around." Levi sets me back on the bed and helps me back into his jacket, ignoring my protests. 

“Lemme see your phone.” Levi doesn’t hesitate before handing it over, yawning and sitting on the edge of the bed. I go to Levi’s contacts and add my number, calling it so that his number will be on my phone. I end it and hand the phone back to him, smiling as Levi takes the phone, tucking it away. A loud beep emits from Levi’s phone minutes later and he grimaces, checking the message and swearing. 

“Eren, I have to go. They’re calling me in to review your case.”

“Go ahead. I’ll be here for most of the day checking out.” Levi stands up and ruffles my hair again, lips turned up in a small smile.

“Let me take you out sometime.”

“For pizza?” Levi’s smile widens and he laughs softly. 

“I know just the place to take you. Stay strong, Eren. I know you can do it.” I nod and wave to Levi as he walks out, Mikasa nodding to him as she walks in. 

“Feeling better?”

“Much. Am I getting a leg?” Mikasa nods, taking my hand as she sits down in the chair next to the bed. 

“We have to wait till the swelling is gone.”

“Will I have physical therapy?” Mikasa gives me a ‘no duh’ look before nodding.

“You won’t be able to actually walk for a month, maybe two.” I nod, pretending to agree with her, but I’m determined to be able to walk sooner. Later that day they give me some bandages to put on my stump to help with the swelling before instructing me on how to wash my stump. My brow furrows in determination as I stare out the car window on the way to Mikasa’s house, watching the sun high in the sky.

“I’m gonna run, Mikasa. I’m gonna do it someday.” Mikasa grips my hand, nodding in silent support. Mikasa helps me into my new wheelchair, locking the car before pushing me up to the door. There’s already a ramp leading up to the porch and I’m touched by Mikasa’s thoughtfulness. She pushes me into the house, chattering about where everything is so that I can wheel myself around if I choose to.

"Mom called." I look up from my feet as I lift myself into the couch out of my chair, hesitant smile on my face.

"What'd she say?"

"She's flying in tomorrow. Do you want to go to the airport with me to pick her up?" I nod quickly, dropping down onto the couch. "Are you hungry? I can make us something."

"Sure." Mikasa places a kiss on my forehead before heading off into the kitchen, leaving me to flip through channels on tv. I find a show that I used to watch all the time and leave it on, half paying attention as I yawn, rubbing at my eyes. I jump when my phone vibrates in my pocket and I fumble to get it, pulling it out. I unlock my phone to a message from Levi, and I read it over twice before responding.

 **[From Levi]:** Hey kid, you alright? You get home okay?

 **[To Levi]:** I'm tired, and my leg feels weird, but I'm fine. Mikasa drove five under the speed limit the whole way so that we wouldn't crash, the roads are pretty bad.

Levi's response comes quickly, so I figure Levi's either on break or at home.

 **[From Levi]:** Mother Nature is really fucking us over, I'm going to breeze my balls off before I even get home.

I laugh at the crudeness of the sentence, imagining Levi waddling around swearing at people. **[To Levi]:** You'd probably be warmer if you had a jacket :P 

**[From Levi]:** You need it more. Are you free tomorrow?

 **[To Levi]:** Mikasa and I are picking my mom up from the airport, so no. Sorry :( 

His response takes longer this time, and I can hear Mikasa in the kitchen setting plates out. I manage to get myself into my wheelchair just as my phone buzzes again.

 **[From Levi]:** Damn. I'll come by in a couple days, okay? Have a good night, Eren.

 **[To Levi]:** Sounds great! You too, Levi. 

I stow my phone away and wheel myself into the kitchen, Mikasa looking up. "I was just about to come get you."

"I heard you putting plates down. Levi's gonna stop by in a couple days, are you okay with that?"

Mikasa shrugs as she sits down, the two of us digging in. "Fine by me. I owe him plenty of thanks."

"Don't we both." I mutter, taking a big bite to avoid saying anything more. Later I help Mikasa wash the dishes, standing up and leaning against the counter despite Mikasa's warnings. It turns out Mikasa is in college to become a doctor, so she watches me closely and won't let me bullshit how much pain I'm in. 

Mr. Smith prescribed some sort of pain pill that's supposed to help me sleep, but I refuse to take them. I'm alright without them, I know I am. Mikasa isn't so sure though, so she makes me take one before sending me off to bed regardless. I lay in bed for who knows how long, staring at the ceiling with all the lights on because I don't want to sit in the dark. I have my phone next to me on the bed, and I'm tempted to text Levi, but when I look at the time to see 1 o'clock taunting me I decide against it. No need to trouble Levi with my stupid fear of the dark. I curl up on my side, clutching my phone as the medicine finally kicks in and I can't help but fall asleep. 

_"Get back here, Eren. Come back to me. I want to see your pretty face as I shove my knife into your body. I want to see that pretty red blood of yours on my hands."_

_No. No, he can't be here. Not now, not ever, never again. Never. Again. I'm angry, so terribly, horrifyingly angry that all I can think to do is scream, scream at him for everything he's done to me. "Fuck you! How could you do this to me? You took away my freedom! You took away everything!" For the second, and possibly the last time, I scream. I scream at him, I lash out, and as he grows weak underneath my blows and voice I grow stronger, towering over him. "You will never, ever, take anything from me again. Not my happiness, not my life, not my name. You will never utter it again,_ Zackley. _You died a disgusting coward, and that's how you'll be remembered. A pathetic piece of shit."_

_Then, as soon as those words leave my lips everything melts away. Zackley's skin boils and drops off, showing insides black to the very core, oozing out and disappearing with a hiss of steam. I stumble back, the realization of what I just did hitting me full force. My chest feels light, so incredibly light, and with a happy laugh I allow myself to cry over my past one last time, for all those who suffered with me. For all those who were killed by his cruel hands. Slowly the dream melts away, and I'm awake._

My eyes snap open and I gasp, sitting up quickly and looking at the full light coming in through the window. The lights in my room are off, but that doesn't bother me much. I grab my phone and check the time, sighing in relief when it shows 7:32 in the morning. I throw the blankets off of me and heave myself into my chair, unlocking the wheels and pushing myself out into the living room. Mikasa is sprawled out on the couch, already dressed for the day and watching the morning news.

"In other news, local resident Eren Jaeger was found alive and is currently recovering with the help of friends and family. Eren was kidnapped in late May of last year, and the police were baffled." Mikasa notices me and goes to turn it off, but I stop her, watching the screen. "There was no evidence of a struggle and there were no eyewitnesses that came forward to tell who took Eren. After nearly a year with no further results the case was to be closed and Eren was believed to be dead, but startling reports from a cold case detective assures us he is very much alive."

"Eren-" I shush her, eyes glued to the tv.

"We have a report from Officer Levi Ackerman, lead detective on the supposed cold case." The feed cuts to a video of Levi, standing straight and chin tipped up, all business. He's in full uniform, face impassive and eyes cool.

_"Officer Ackerman, is it true that you’re investigating the Jaeger case?”_

_“It is. I was called in yesterday, and I’ve been working ever since.”_

_“You seem very determined to find Mr. Jaeger. Why investigate a case with no leads?”_

Levi shrugs, eyes sharp as he regards the interviewer, and I snicker when I see the interviewer physically flinch. _“Let me ask you a question. What gives any of us the right to give up on him? I’ve seen cases spanning decades that got solved, but this young man is missing for little more than a year and you’ve all already given up?”_

The interviewer is speechless by this point, mouth hanging open as she looks into the camera quickly, eyes wide. She clears her throat and smiles nervously at Levi. _“With no possible leads to follow, officer, wouldn’t it be near impossible to locate him?”_

 _“That’s the key word. Near, but not completely impossible. I’ll be damned if I let him fade away because people aren’t willing to work just a little bit harder to find him.”_ Levi’s eyes are blazing with emotion and his brow is furrowed slightly, and with one final look to the camera the video cuts off abruptly, flashing back to the reporters face.

I don’t listen to what she has to say afterwards, my mouth dry and eyes wide with astonishment. “He was more determined to find you than even I was, Eren.”

“Did he ever sleep?”

Mikasa laughs and gets up off of the couch. “Not that I know of, no. I’ll make you some breakfast, you go get dressed. We have to be at the airport by 9.” I nod and roll myself back into my temporary room, dressing as quick as I can after checking the bandage around my stump. 

______________________________________________________________

It turns out Mom is even stronger than I remember, because she lifts me clear out of my chair while hugging me and crying. “My baby is back! I love you so much, Eren, I was so scared!” I cough and pat her back, wobbling when she sets me down, instinctively grabbing onto her to steady myself.

“I’m right as rain, ma. There’s no need to be scared.” My mom helps me sit back down in my wheelchair, Mikasa hugging Carla and looping their arms together while we move towards baggage claim. 

“Are you sure you wouldn’t rather come back with me, Eren? I can take care of you.” I smile at the offer but shake my head, fingers sliding over the metal push bar on the wheels. 

“I’m doing alright here, ma. I’ve got friends to help me, so you and dad don’t have to worry, okay?”

My mom doesn’t look convinced, but her face softens and she leans down to kiss my cheek. “Alright dear, if that’s what you think is best. Oh! Did you see the news this morning? That young officer, Levi, I think his name was? What a scary man! I’m glad he didn’t stop looking, though.”

“He isn’t that scary.” My voice is soft and I pull the jacket tighter around me, my mother grinning like a kid on Christmas.

“Does my little boy have a cruuuush?” I choke on air and start coughing, my mom rubbing my back and grinning at me as Mikasa pulls her bag off the line.

“M-ma! Not so loud.” Carla giggles and covers her mouth, eyes shining happily. 

“I won’t tell, I swear. Your secret is safe with me.” She winks, actually winks at me! As if I’m in middle school again and I have my first crush.

“I’m not a little kid anymore ma, I can ask him out on a date with I want to.”

“So you do like him!” I shoot her a warning look and she giggles again, pinching my cheek lightly. “Did you ask him yet?”

“You’re really pushy, you know that?” My mom only laughs, looking at me before pretending to pick up a phone. I narrow my eyes and shake my head,but my mother's smile only grows bigger.

“Oh come on, Eren! I know you like him, and it’s not like you’re that busy. Go out with him, give it a chance! Oh oh, go out tonight!” 

“You aren’t going to let this go, are you?” She shakes her head, and when I look to Mikasa she only nods encouragingly. “Of course you guys gang up on me. Fine, I’ll call him and ask him out. Women.” Mom tugs on my ear in warning and I grunt, pulling out my phone and wheeling away from them. I hit the call button once I find his contact, holding the phone up to my ear. It rings once, twice, and then again before I hear the click signalling he picked up.

“Eren? Are you alright?” Levi’s voice is thick with sleep, his usual rumbling timber softer. My heart picks up speed at the sound and I have to clear my throat before I can speak.

“Hey, did I wake you up?”

“Mhmm. Did you pick your mom up already?”

“Yeah, I’m actually at the airport still. There’s something I want to ask you though.”

“Oh? I’m listening.” I can hear the amusement in Levi’s voice, but he also sounds curious, so I charge ahead.

“Do you maybe want to go out with me tonight?” I let the words rush out on a single breath, biting my lip as I draw in a nervous breath. There’s a moment of silence before Levi chuckles softly in my ear.

“I’d love to. Pizza?”

I laugh and lean back, sighing happily. “Yes please. Seven fine?”

“Seven is perfect. Seen you then, Eren.” 

“Bye Levi.” I hang up and look over to see Mikasa and my mom grinning, bouncing like a couple of schoolgirls as they rush over.

“What’d he say?” I stare down at my phone, not really believing what happened.

“He said yes.” The two of them squeal and bombard me with hugs, the three of us laughing and grinning like idiots. “I have a date with Levi tonight. I have a date, ma!”

“Yes you do! I’m so proud of you!” Mom pushes me out while chattering excitedly, Mikasa smiling and walking beside me.

______________________________________________________________

It turns out that I don’t have a lot of dress up clothes, so I just pull on my nicest pair on jeans, hoping for the best. I roll myself out of the room, my mother sweeping up pieces of hair into a dustpan. My head is a lot lighter now that I cut most of it off, going from the long mess it had been while I was in captivity to a more manageable length. I find myself wheeling around the kitchen, too nervous to sit still because holy fuck this is the first time since high school that I’ve gone out on a date. There’s a knock on the door and I jump in my chair, pushing myself out of the kitchen and towards the front door as my mother pulls the door open. 

She pulls him in for a quick hug, smiling with tears in her eyes. “Thank you, Levi. Thank you so much. You take good care of him.”

“Yes ma’am.” Levi’s eyes lock with mine and he smiles softly, my own lips spreading in a radiant grin as I stop in front of him. Levi is wearing jeans as well, ones that hug his hips quite nicely, and a black sweater, a scarf around his neck. “Hi.”

“Hey.” Levi steps out of the way so that I can wheel out onto the porch before he pokes his head and waves goodbye, pulling the door shut before we head off, Levi picking me up and placing me in the passenger seat before loading my wheelchair in the back, closing my door for me. He’s quick to go around the car, sliding into the drivers seat and immediately looking over at me.

“You cut your hair.” Levi reaches up and brushes the hair away from my forehead, fingertips lingering on my cheek a moment before he retracts his hand. “You look nice.”

“Thank you.” The drive is fairly silent, but Levi takes my hand during the drive, thumb smoothing over my knuckles absently. The drive isn’t long, and before I know it I’m in my wheelchair and Levi is pushing me into the restaurant. It’s a small pizza joint, but judging from the heavenly smells wafting through the room their pizza is very good. A nice lady leads us towards a table, taking one of the chairs out of the way so I can roll up to the table. She hands me my menu and pulls out a notebook, smiling happily.

“Hi guys, I’m Sasha, I'll be your server for tonight. What do you two fine men want tonight for a drink?”

“I’ll have a peach tea.” Sasha nods and scribbles it down, looking towards me.

“Oh uh, I’ll have the same thing.” Sasha nods and writes something else before smiling and heading off to the kitchen. Levi looks over the menu for a moment before setting it down, leaning forward on his elbows, eyes searching my face. 

“Hawaiian?” I nod with a smile, scooting forward in the chair. 

“I saw you on the news this morning.” Levi sighs and opens his mouth to speak but I place my hand on his, eyes twinkling with unshed tears. “Thank you, Levi. Thank you for believing in me.”

Levi’s whole body relaxes and he threads our fingers together, squeezing lightly in reassurance. “You’re welcome.” Dinner is a quick affair; I laugh at Levi again for cutting his pizza up and he retaliates by flicking a piece of ice down my shirt, smug smirk on his face as I twist around to get it out. I manage to eat three pieces, and Levi eats the rest, surprising both me and him, his only explanation being that he hadn’t eaten lunch. I don’t mind though, I let Levi push me out of the restaurant after arguing over the bill, Levi insisting he pays (which he ends up doing even though I asked him out). We start an impromptu snowball fight, Levi eventually ducking behind my wheelchair where I can’t reach him, the two of us laughing before finally getting into his car. Levi brushes snow out of his hair as I shake myself like a dog, dislodging snow as it melts in my hair. 

Levi is respectful as always, walking me to the door and standing on the porch with me. Levi smiles down at me and leans down, placing a warm kiss on the corner of my mouth, lips lingering for a moment before he goes to stand back up. I grab a hold of his scarf and pull him back down, our noses bumping as I smile cheekily. “You missed.” Levi smiles and cups the back of my neck, our lips connecting softly as he lets out a little sigh. Levi’s arms slip around me securely and he lifts me to my feet, holding me tight as our lips move in tandem. 

The kiss is sweet, slow, and I don’t think I would be able to stand even with two legs, because when Levi sweeps his tongue over my bottom lip I melt into him, lips parting with a soft moan. Levi tastes like pizza and peach tea, but I can’t get enough of it, fingers burying in his hair as we part and reconnect again, kissing each other breathlessly. Eventually the real world will come back to us and someone will yell at us for making out on the porch like a couple of teenagers, but for now I’ll kiss Levi. For now I’ll kiss him, and later when I’m struggling to walk or the pain in my leg is greater than what I can handle, Levi will be there. And so will I, and it’s all because of a man who was too stubborn to give up on someone he didn’t even know.


End file.
